They're Back
by RandomDustBunnyzAngel
Summary: Who? Well they're mostly, stock characters...Actually all execpt one are stock characters. A sure stupid parody type thing -that is only a parody because it fits into no other category- for chap 535. Don't like bad jokes? Don't read.


**How come everytime the world joins together to do something good, somebody shows up and ruins everything? (Eg - The Japanese Red Cross) To the surprise of many it wasn't America being a douche this time! **

**Warnings: Foul language, lots of questions marks, bad writing, bad jokes, weirdness, slight OOC-ness. The usual.**

**Thankies: Yuti-chan! QueenOfFanFicWorldLoveGunner and Princess Zathura.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own NARUTO Masashi Kishimoto and TvTokyo do.**

**Ready-Set...GO! GO! GO!**

Last chapter Naruto ran away from Killer-Bee and a group of nobodies showed up to stop him.

So, like always, this chapter starts with silence! In the cave of the eight tales, behind the Waterfall of truth, on the island of the giant sky turtle which is now on Vlad's island, Those few stock characters stood. This is starting to sound like a Stephen King movie.

All we're missing is Tim Curry.

Naruto gapped at his teacher who had just stepped out from behind Lord of the Flies much larger siblings,"Iruka-sensei, You're here?," he asked, completely ignoring the other ninja in the room.

Iruka chuckled,"We're here to support you on a new mission you've been assigned," he answered. This should be interesting, these are the people that thought ecology was a good excuse,"A new species has been discovered on the island," Dolphin nose continued.

Naruto blinked disbelievingly,"By who?," he asked, flabbergasted (It's a real word)

"Yeah Iruka, by who?," Porn star Mustache looked at the Large circle cheeked monster man who was try to stifle his laughter.

Iruka sweated,"Captain...Black nose," Of Turtle Island tourism and Jet-Ski rentals.

"Earlier I felt a chakra similar to the nine-tails, do you think they're related?," The blond haired little firefly fox ninja (He is a lot of things now isn't he?) tilted his head cutely.

Iruka nodded,"Yes, you see Black nose was sitting on the beach with his young Lass," and we're swept back into a scenario that never happened! Whee!

000

A tiny banged up white dingy floated above the waters surface, impaled on a spike that ran through it center. The two ninja that were in it not long ago, drenched by salt water and covered in algae sat on the beach, shaking as the wind blew.

A Large, fat furry brown creature with a bill and almond eyes sat beside them, scratching its bottom with its long sharp claws.

"This island sucks," Captain black nose (Senior Black Noses twin brother) that had been driving the boat cursed.

Mr Big Brown and Itchy gently growled in agreement.

000

"And then we arrived to help them and saw the creature run off into the forest," The unidentified Nara of the group explained,

"So that's why Yamato isn't with you? he's capturing it?," Naruto's question made half the ninja team sweat, it was times like this they were glad the boy was slow.

"Sure," One of muttered.

The big guy with X's on his face nudged his brother,"That fit surprisingly well," the other nodded.

"If there is some animal running around with the Kyuubi's chakra shouldn't I go capture it? It is my job,"

The scarred chunnin laughed nervously,"We-well, no actually, you can't,"

"Why not?,"

The others inched back slowly but listened intently.

"Because your chakra will scare it," Iruka said simply, making the others shake their heads, "Now let's go back inside,"

But suddenly, Naruto pauses and his expression darkens as he remembers that Killer-Bee has control over all the animals on the island, he is the ultimate pokemon master after all, creating a huge hole in Iruka's cover story, do the ninja that send these guys out do any research or did they just think Naruto was going around punching the animals in the face and dragging them back to the cave? I know it's not that much of a stretch, but still.

Naruto crouched/leaned forward (Couldn't decide) and glared,"An animal is making trouble, so it's my duty to take care of it!," Anybody complaining that Kit was acting to smart will be happy with this, because he charged at the WALL of ninja in an attempt to get out.

YES! Our Fox-boy is back!

"Stop him!," Iruka ordered.

"right!," The Akimichi brothers slid into place so they cloud block Naruto's path. Then we skip outside, how did Kit get past those two human building? Dunno, all we know is that the force of whatever he did not only threw his hand band like twenty feet away from him but also untied the damn thing, these guys need to learn to tie a good knot ,seriously those things come loose too easy.

Naruto quickly followed his headband through the waterfall, only to be caught by the creepy looking Nara's shadow technique the second he landed.

"Calm down, we aren't going to hurt you," Iruka said calmly.

Apparently our marry band of idiots have forgotten that they're standing at the waterfall of truth, and guess what happens.

Right Naruto, who's standing on the bank facing the waters edge (Cause these guys are smart!), looks out over the water and is dragged into a panel white watery void that play clips of random blob like characters. Why does Kakashi look so comic releaf? Wasn't he going to go all "I'm the Copy Cat bitch," on the swordsmen?

"What is this?," Naruto whispered disbelievingly, bet he wishes he didn't run away from the cave,"What the hell is going on out there?~!," he screamed.

"A slumber-party?," Big Akimichi scar faced brother peeped, he meeped when the spiky head glared at him.

"It's war, Madara is making his move," Iruka sighed.

Correction, Madara already made his move, the war is like the Pawn on the chess board of plot development, it's given more freedom to roam but that's all it can do since it can't jump any other pieces.

"Nice analogy,"

Numbers make my head fuzzy (They do :3).

"And the surprise is replaced with shame," The Aburame shook his head slowly before blinking, right Iruka juts blew the secret, it's time to blow up!, "Iruka! How could you be so mushy?~!,"

"You all know Naruto isn't that dumb," I beg to differ, "He'll figure it out whether we tell him or not, better he find out this way then have some random stock ninja tell him,"

"Hey!," The big twin with circles on his cheeks whined.

"Shut it Jerry you know it's true,"

"Yeah, shut it Jerry! I want to hear one good reason why I should sit on my ass doing nothing while my friends are all dying!," Naruto pointed to the water.

none of your friends are dying, only the useless characters are.

"She's right even Kakashi is okay and back to his one eyed, deadpanned faced self," The Chuunin said, seeing the gennin's face droop he sighed,"The reason you can't leave is because we're fighting this war to protect you and if you just leap into action,"

_'Which he'll do,'_ The others added in their minds.

"All our efforts are going to be fruitless," Iruka walked over and put his hands on Naruto's shoulders,"Don't let that happen Naruto, don't let our ninja tree be fruitless, a ninja is nothing without our fruit,"

"What about Love?," The blond asked.

"And ice cream," Iruka smiled.

"What?,"

"What?,"

The teacher and student stared at each other in confusion for a few seconds, before Naruto spoke,"Weren't you saying something about the war,"

"Oh yes, people are dying to protect you, if Madara get's his hands on you and Killer-Bee we're screwed," But if you kill Naruto, Kyuubi will die with him, won't he?, "This is my emotional speech!,"

As he listened Naruto thought back to the Pain Invasion arc. Does anybody care about what Nagato said? Does anybody even _remember _what Nagato said? no, no one does. You can go look it up real quick, we'll wait!

"The hell we will," Iruka scoffed.

All the ninja turned their attention back to Naruto,"Does no one remember my ninja way?," he asked as he turned into Super Saiyan Naruto! (Also known as sannin), "I'll endure tha hate and pain on my own!,"

"Did you even listen to me?~! You have the nine tails inside of you! This isn't just your problem Naruto!," Iruka yelled.

"You were the first person to trust me! Why do you only care about the nine tails?~!," Is this the part were we all flashback to Gaara?

Amazing we didn't flashback, but we do get an ear full of screeching harpies.

"Stop acting like a baby!,"

"Stop treating me like one!,"

Naruto and Iruka stopped to catch their breath and because screaming for three panels strait is hard on the lungs and throat, iruka started them off again in a softer tone.

Once again we see a flashback this time to the start of the series.

"You're one of my most precious students, you're like a little brother to me Naruto," sincerity, not Kishi's strong point, but this works,"Madara Uchiha is after you, how could I let you out there?,"

"I'm not a kid anymore, I'm stronger than I've ever been," Naruto rolled his eyes and let the red markings fade from his face.

Sad but not discouraged, Iruka bent down and picked up Naruto's head band, characters seem to be teleporting a lot here lately, haven't they?

He handed it to Naruto who took it and smiled.

That's sweet and all but, war, death, screaming, bodies burning, does no one remember this?

All seemed well, until,"I still can't let you leave," Scar face created a hand sign and with this hand sign appeared a seal-like pattern on the ground and water.

IT'S A TRAP! (Tee hee 've always wanted to do that ^_^)

Naruto smirked and transformed into Super Gary-stu, there's a lot of Super this chapter, isn't there,"Dude, mad Firefly powers now, you really think this can hold me?," Glowing Fox-boy laughed dryly.

"Saw that coming," The Nara in the group grumbled.

Shino's dad twitched,"Really? 'Cause I didn't!,"

"You know sometimes your sarcasm hurts," Unnamed Nara clan member three deadpanned.

"Guys!," Iruka shouted.

"Sorry!," The two bickering ninja shouted back.

In their moment of "I'm going to be the dumbass of this chapter and not pay attention"-ness, Naruto took his chance to show off his super jumping ability! By leaping like fifty feet in the air and while that is impressive it's still something even Sasuke can do.

As they finally realize their Fopa the two most useless characters ever, do what they do best, use their abilities even though they obviously won't work and then start barking orders.

Naruto has bugs stuck to his foot (That was random).

"Temui, Warn the Barrier Squad in the direction Naruto's heading that's he's heading right towards them!," Shibi ordered (He will go back to Random guy the next time he shows up)

In the forest Naruto flew through the air, startling many a duck, bird, squirrel and Chipmunk bastard.

He was pissed at his teacher for lying to him, now in true Naruto style this just can't happen so like usual, something happens. something completely predictable.

As he went to put on his head band, out little idiot to love and all things logical, found a note behind the metal plate.

"Huh?," he grunted dumbly as he opened it.

Don't let the End credits fool you, this is not a cliffhanger! For once I kind of wanted it to be, the letter -being as corny as any speech in this series- goes on and on about how Iruka knew Naruto would probably run off and that he should come back alive. Which he will, we all know it, no use denying it. And _then _we end!

**random time (Not that good! T_T)**

In the cavern/cave thing in the middle of another cavern/cave thing. Madara was in his back-up morgue, organizing jars of eyes on a shelf.

When suddenly the wooden door to the room creaked, he turned and narrowed his eyes at the door, which was now cracked open. After watching the blackness beyond the door for movement for a few moments he went over and closed it.

He waited for a few more seconds after that to see would open again, he shrugged. The lock was probably broken he'd have to get Zetsu to fix it...On second thought, that might not be the best idea, what with all the body parts laying around.

Madara needed all the eyes and arms he could get, seeing as he was starting to lose them rather quickly.

He sighed. Stupid Konan, why did she have to be so compulsive?

As if by mere chance a large shadow stretched across the doorway,_"Mew"_ a tiny high squeak echoed in the large space.

Flinching, Madara spun on his heel, to see a little black cat sitting on the metal exam table which just happened to be right in front of a candle in the corner.

"Hey it's the kitty Sasuke almost ate," The Uchiha blinked at the creature, who blinked right back and even started to purr.

He moved to the left, he moved to the right, he even ducked down. But wherever he went the cats creepy glass like eyes followed, her purring getting even louder as her tail began to flick back and forth over the edge of the table.

Eventually the kitty got bored of his little game and yawned before mewing and kneading her paws as she curled up in a little ball.

Madara straitened himself from his crouch,"Guess you are kind of cute," he muttered, reaching over to scratch her behind the ears, making her push her head into the palm of his hand.

He smiled a bit when the kitty poked her tongue out before deciding to get back to work. He headed for the shelf but stopped as he felt something wrap around his leg, Madara rose an eyebrow and pulled that's when he noticed a shining glint stretching across the floor, his eyes widened as the thin piece of wire dragged across the shelf, sliding the jars of irreplaceable oculars off as it pulled taunt and fell.

"DAMN IT!,"

Hearing the crash the kitten cracked open an eye and smirked. Revenge on the Uchiha!

**(Akimichi - Nara - Aburame)**

**End:**

**Soul Eater chapters available on MangaHere (.) com for some reason the site I used no longer updates.**

**My God my back hurts so bad D: and now my knee and foot are throbbing too! In good news I finnished my tests early! Thank you for reading please review, favorite and all that good stuff. Bye!**


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